Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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