You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
