Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
