Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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