Its about making memories worth repressing
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
