got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
