These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
