Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
