tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
