Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Randomize