My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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