If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
