i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
