But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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