69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
