So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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