i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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