he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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