Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
