It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
