you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
