Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
