you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Houston, we have a squirter
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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