so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm like, not good at living.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
