I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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