Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
