Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
