dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
