but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
