If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
