PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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