Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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