this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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