Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I think a kid would responsible me up
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
