I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
