what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
God, I missed his penis.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
