i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
