I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
