Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
