Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
i drank out of a bidet.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize