PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
