I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
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