So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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