So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
