i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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