Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
