i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
