Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
