i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
