i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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