I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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