you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize